Lifting like a dude

So yesterday was another session with Matt. After working out with him twice a week for 8 months I have now cut back to once every two weeks. It's definitely harder to push myself when I'm working out alone, but I've also added in BootCamp and BodyPump into my schedule so others can tell me what to do.

The plan for yesterday was to do a leg work out. A few of my friends had "leg sessions" earlier in the week with another trainer, Stacey, and they had all mentioned how much pain they were in afterwards. I was starting to psyche myself out, like I normally do. I've had a very productive week of workouts thus far, but I was afraid that my legs would tire out before we got to the workout. We started on my FAVORITE machine, the Smiths Machine. This has a bar set on a track that keeps it in line. You have to make sure the bar is rolled back, otherwise it will hook in place and you may be in a little bit of trouble.

Anyway, we did a warm up set of deep squats (see video) and then Matt just started adding more weights. By the end of the squats I was at 175lbs. We did the deep squats and then Matt pulled a bench in and I would squat until I touched the bench, lifting back up. The whole time I was doing the squats I could just feel this guy staring at me. It was a good stare, like a ddaaaayyyyuuummmmm stare. Anything more than the 45lb plates looks intimidating.

We did a couple sets of single leg lunges (back leg up on a step) afterwards. My legs were already shaking. This was followed by some stairs (3 at a time, forward then sideways), laying down hamstring curls (sorry bench), and alternating straight leg/bent knee dead lifts. I'm not sure what the weights were on the hamstring curls, but I think the dead lifts were somewhere between 75-90. When we were done, Matt "apologized" that we weren't able to get to the inclined (declined?) leg press. I would like to see where I'm at now, as opposed to 3 months ago, and if it would matter doing the leg presses at the beginning or end of the workout. This was back in May (680lbs). Maybe you'll get an update in the upcoming weeks

And now for the point of this post. I'm coming to grips with reality. I think it's safe to say that I'm stronger than your average woman. I'm still a little shy (?) when it comes to lifting the heavier weights. I somehow think that if I can out-benchpress a guy then I lose my femininity. But part of me then realizes that doing squats (or any strength training for that matter) at a lower weight won't be doing me any good. I have to do the weight that is challenging for me. I'm still weak in some areas (shoulders, biceps anyone??), but for the most part, it's pretty above average.

For the guys out there who actually read this (are there any?).. Is it intimidating when a girl is lifting more than you? Are you afraid she might beat you up? Am I kind of crazy (don't answer that)?

It usually comes up that the fact is I'm also heavier and have been carrying around a lot of weight for a good portion of my life has caused my body to build up certain strengths so I don't crush myself and that I can actually be mobile. I forgot how the conversation started, but I said something last night that I truly believe. I may say that I hate whatever exercise we're doing (at this time it was the deadlifts), but I know that I'll love it when I'm done. It's great to see your body do things you never thought possible. So to everyone out there, quit doubting yourself. If you want to change, do it! You will find the strength, energy, commitment that you need to if the want and desire (and in my case NEED) is there.

Here's to not psyching myself out, living with the knowledge that I can secretly whoop all of the guys in my office, and basking in the light of my physical strength. Thank you, body, for not falling apart on me when I took such horrible care of you.

Or walking to the next machine

side note: I went all day yesterday without any additional candy, chocolate, sugar. I'm halfway through today. Thank you to those who posted on Facebook their ideas, suggestions for quitting sugar. Hi, my name is Erin and I'm a sugar addict. One day at a time!